A recent newspaper article promoting a speaker for an organization of medical professionals touted the speaker as someone who would remind the audience to "lighten up" and not take life so seriously. Because of the serious nature of our work, we sometimes forget to laugh at life. Please share with us the amusing and downright hold your sides laughing things that you have seen, done or overheard lately!
"Bold text" means, "This is a demand letter. I want that second paragraph to have more teeth in it than that!!"
"Undo last command" means, "I know I told you to fax that letter to Pete in San Antonio, but I have changed my mind, and I want Ed in Amarillo to see that letter before Pete sees it in San Antonio and fax his comments back to me before you fax to Pete, and I may want Carl to look it over too, but I am not sure yet."
"Copy selected text" means, "Find those indemnity provisions that we put in that deal with those guys in El Paso last year, but be sure to delete any references to the pending litigation, the possible breach of contract, and whatever else looks like it doesn't fit; other than that, it should work."
"Reveal codes" means, "De minimis non curat lex (I don't care which of you works the Friday after Thanksgiving as long as one of you is here that day)."
You absolutely assured an impatient client that the attorney would be back in the office by 2 p.m. (and made an appointment for him to see the attorney), but it is 1:59 p.m., and the attorney has called to say, "Hi, Beth, we decided to stay over in Houston until tomorrow. Anything going on there?"
You and the attorney completed an enormous package of loan documents last night at 12 p.m., but you didn't make copies because it was late and you were beat. The out-of-town clients are due in to sign documents at 9 a.m., and at 8:30 a.m., you discover that the copier is totally out of commission.
The Court Clerk calls at 4:49 p.m. to tell you that the pleading you had delivered is not signed.
It is Friday (casual-dress day at the office!) so you wore your old grey slacks, baggy pink sweater, and "comfortable" shoes. As the attorney breezes by your desk on his way in, he says, "I meant to tell you that I want you to go to the pre-trial hearing with me at 10:30 a.m. I really need you there."
You had liver and onions for lunch, and at 2 p.m., and the attorney announces an unscheduled meeting for you with an important client.
You sit in front of the fire at home summarizing depositions.
The proper use of hyphenation matters to you.
A "fun" Saturday means you don't have to go to the office!
At the sale, you choose a navy blue suit over the cute skirt and sweater appliqued with big sunflowers.
A "Plea in Intervention" means something to you beyond, "Mom, make him stop putting his feet on my side of the car!"
The Gregg Reference Manual is your bedside reading.
During lunch with your buddies, the discussion concerns the latest revisions to the Family Code, rather than the juiciest divorce in your town.
The romantic weekend with your significant other is planned around a two-day bankruptcy seminar in Dallas.
Video means "Last Chance" to you, not "the Sound of Music".
You know all the rules for forming possessives and are delighted to tell others.
Despite your college degree, work experience, professional training and degree of expertise, you make less money than the kid you struggled to put through college!
(Your own "You May Be a Paralegal If" ideas are enthusiastically solicited for publication!)
Anonymously submitted:
Legal Assistants Do It With Attorney Supervision!
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